Insecurity.

"we all have insecurities. they piggyback on the vulnerability inherent in our humanity. the question is whether or not our insecurities are substantial enough to hurt, limit, or even distract us from profound effectiveness or fulfillment of purpose. are they cheating us of the powerful and abundant life jesus flagrantly promised?" - Beth Moore.

"So Long, Insecurity" by Beth Moore, was recently recommended to me by a good friend. I went into this book with two different aspects: one, I've read so many books that have brushed the topic of insecurity and now here is another one. I sure hope this doesn't get boring and that I lose interest. And then the other aspect, I could really use any advice right now. I'm feeling more insecure than ever, lately, and I just need help.

Let me just say I am more than pleased and I am only into the first two chapters. Right off the bat, it hit home; I felt all of the author's words speaking right to me and at times made me flush in the cheeks because I was embarrassed that almost everything Moore wrote was true in my life.

Insecurity has been more relevant in my life recently dealing with an insecurity, labeled jealousy. It's a nasty one, to say the least! I hate it. I don't try to be jealous, it just happens. And quite frankly I don't like it when I am jealous. I honestly never ever thought it was linked to being insecure. And this jealousy occurs most in a relationship, even just friendship. I'm trying to deal with it, and its rough. But I am putting some faith in this book and hoping it will provide me with some answers and a new outlook on life.

"The Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap." Proverbs 3:26.

food for thought.

"God always acts in your best interest, even when it is painful and you don't understand it."

A prayer that was said during this past semester, at BSM large group on a Tuesday evening; it really spoke to my heart and got me thinking.

It went something like this: Lord, let me hear you! Allow me to clear my heart and mind to really listen to you. I've learned that I can't listen to myself and trust my own heart. My life is yours! only you know the ultimate plans for me...and I have to learn to trust you. amen.

do you remember?

so many memories and experiences in the past few months.

I don't know if I want to recall them.? Some are good & others bring tears to my eyes. They'll be memories for me...whether I like them to be or not, I have no say in that right now.

[sigh's]

I need to focus. And right now that means focusing on my one true Love-Christ. I need to build my relationship, strengthen it, and renew it. I need to clear my heart and mind. I want to fall back in love with Him & feel close to Him again...I feel so far away.

I do thank the Lord for my AMAZING parents and for awesome friends. I needed them the most the past month.

I am still struggling with things, but I hope, and do believe I am getting better...unless there is another crazy twist to life again?

Just pray my head doesn't explode. :) thats exaggerating it, but do keep me in prayer and that I can maintain low stress.