a year in the making.

if you told me this time last year, that i would have participated in five different races in one year, i would have laughed in your face. i am ever grateful for the ability to run. and i’m thankful for the motivation that i’ve received from family and friends, but also the motivation inside of myself that grew.

i didn’t like running, it’s a love/hate relationship with me. i love running because it makes me feel better; the feeling after a run is exhilarating — be it one mile or five miles. i hate running because i don’t have the motivation all of the time. i don’t always have the will to get myself out and off a chair to get outside. i love running because it relieves stress and it allows me to get outside and clear my head. i hate running because i’m not the fastest at it, but my God i love running because it’s pushed me so far and i’ve come a long ways from before! do you get the point? 

running is amazing and if you have the ability to experience it, i would definitely recommend it {did i, megan, just say that?! — shocker} you will grow, you will discover yourself on the runs and you will find that motivation deep inside of you. but, goodness, do it for yourself, and no one else. do it because you strive to be healthy, mentally and physically. 

i’m ever grateful for that journey of seeking motivation to come to where i am today. it’s been 13 months in the making, and i’m sure i’ve got plenty more ahead of me. there will be days where i don’t feel like running — like today, but i’m already dressed and about to head out the door. push through it & you’ll thank yourself in about thirty minutes. 

Matthew 6:25-34

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

And why do you worry about your clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

We read this last night, as a part of large group’s sermon. It really hit home as things shift from the busyness of school, to summer. I will be the first to admit that I do worry about the future.

I do worry — how am I going to build up my savings account {prepping for getting out of college} when I only work all of 12 hours in a week? How am I going to make it, paying my “bills” monthly, when I can barely get by pay-check to pay-check. 

I do worry about school. I’ve had my set-backs in college, learning lessons, and I am “paying” for them. As much as I would love to be done next year, I will most likely be going an extra year or so. It’s not ideal, but it’s something I’m learning to cope with. 

And I was reminded last night that I need not worry, for He already knows what is on my heart. He knows the things that I really need. It’s a marvelous thing, you know? If only I can recognize that all of the time. And I was reminded that when worrying comes my way that I only need to pray — recognize the good in the situation, praise Him for that, and ask Him to help me through this struggle. Grant-it, it’s much easier said than done. But there is definitely truth to that. If I take the time to pray, just be still, and pray, be it every five minutes that I need to rejuvenate my faith or every few hours, etc. I need to pray. And by doing this, you’re slowly letting God take control of the situation {this will be hard for those area’s of my life that I am a control-freak about} and the worrying will subside. 

I got to thinking this morning, as I reread that passage, and I think I’m going to take on this challenge. I didn’t give my life to Him for no reason, I gave it to Him to take ownership — it’s about time I start letting Him take control again. 

season.

i read this, this morning, and i find these words stinging and yet promising. i've had my fair share of ups and downs through this season of my life and i pray that a new season comes along, soon. to embrace this season of my life is something that i need to learn to do, with grace. i know it's a transitional period, but my Lord, i don't know how much longer i can handle it. 

don't get me wrong, i am enjoying myself and loving my fair share of life, but i just know there is something greater out there, for me. i'm longing for something more.

i'm thankful for a very influential book i've picked up this past week, A Heart Like His {Beth Moore}. it's teaching me about the life of David and the trials and tribulations he's encountered. i find myself relating to some very key parts of his life and i long to keep reading, hoping i can find a peace within and a strength from up above. 


picture credit

Balancing Opposite-Sex Friendships

My dearest twenty-one year old girl,

This letter may come as a hurtful surprise to you, but please, keep reading.  I know that right now you don’t understand boundaries between a man and a woman.  You’re not even sure yet why, when and how they exist.  And right now you’re naive to the fact that in friendships, emotions and pasts and physical touch can be confusing and messy and lead down hurtful roads.  You’re a “guy’s girl”.  We all know one—the kind of girl who thinks that most women on this earth except for her are catty and jealous and can’t be trusted.

There’s a reason why, right now, I’m referring to you as a “girl”.

There is an unhealthy balance in seeking out more friendships with the opposite sex than your own.  Let’s be honest—guys and girls were made opposite sexes for a reason, and it wasn’t to just be friends.  Is it possible to maintain friendships with each other? Absolutely.  But we should learn our limits in those friendships, especially in those crucial teens and twenties when we are figuring out ourselves and the world around us.

Darling—no man, no matter how good of a friend he is to you, should be the one you confide in about all the turbulent places this world will take your sweet heart and mind.  He cannot be your validation when your self-esteem has been challenged, and he will not be able to speak into those inherent longings inside you that only a woman would understand.  Remember that who you need to be filled with is the One who made you, not the one standing in front of you. 

While you are not responsible for the choice a man makes to lust, don’t intentionally drive a man in your life to do so.  And if you find out he is struggling, don’t bring him down or punish him.  Encourage him to seek help and show him grace.

That guy you’re talking to whose heart is wrapped up in or committed to someone else?  Take a step away, love.  Offering parts of yourself to someone who can’t offer anything back will only hurt you in the long run.  It is not up to you to change his heart.

Be wary of what you post online and how much of yourself you’re letting the world in on for free.  Those photos of yourself and the guys you’re with do not do justice to the heart beating inside of you.  Think of everything you want to give your future husband and don’t give those things away to people who aren’t him.  When you meet that man who you want to spend the rest of your life with, you’ll want him to trust you with other guys and know he is getting all of you.

Now here’s one you’re really not going to want to hear— If one of you in an opposite sex friendship is dating someone, don’t spend ample time alone with each other.  And don’t seek out the wrong kind of relationship advice from your opposite sex friends.  You know the type—when you really only want to hear what will validate you and not what is best for everyone involved. 

Love your brothers as Christ would—equally and unconditionally.  Respect their hearts and the place they are in, but show the same care and give the same encouragement to all.

If one of your friends is struggling, walk with him in encouragement, love, and lack of judgment, but also direct your friend to mentors, counselors and disciplers who have the wisdom and experience to establish long-term help.

Recognize spiritual warfare in one another and pray against it.  Fight for each other’s hearts in Christ.

Seek out other ladies.  Surround yourself with strong women who have been there and done that, or who can speak true feminine wisdom into this season of your life.  Don’t boast in “men just understanding you better.”  Men and women were not created with the same hearts.  Cherish the femininity in yours and find good women to share it with.

And remember that you are worth so much more than what you’ve already lost.  Your God is the Father of redemption, and you are one of His delivered.  Let your friendships with the men in your life reflect that always.

Love,

Yourself, four years wiser

[Because sometimes the very words we need to hear are our own]

via Shannonicole

The 20's Project [update]

All Sons & Daughters.

All Sons & Daughters This duo couple are my new favorite band. Take a listen to their very real, inspiring, chill, music. You will not regret it. xo meg

what a relief.

"O LORD, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it." — Psalms 139:1-6 I read this today, and I thought, what a relief it is to know that You are the wonderful God that You are?! I mean, to really think about it: "You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar." Shoot, You're this almighty Being that gives a hoot about me! I should be thanking you every second of everyday for this. I should be more than excited to spread this love you provide for me. And yet I find myself lacking in this very thing. Here I am, more concerned about a mistake I made a month ago, that's already done and over with, some thing that I cannot change or rewind or even want to mention again, and I should be more thankful and gracious towards the fact that You forgave me. You, out of the grace in your heart, forgave me! I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I'm struggling with this "situation", again, when I know I should put it past me. [It's called the past for a reason]. God, I need your help. I cannot do this alone. I find that in the most strange times, like walking down the dark streets of campus, thinking about a January night in 2010. The memories flood my mind. It's overbearing and that's when the emotions sneak back in. I hate that they do, because I am in the healing process. I'm in the process of moving on, despite what I really want to do. But God, I read this passage and am reminded of Your love. "You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me." God, in the midst of feeling alone or feeling defeated, I am ever thankful for the reminder that You are always there. You are the one that provides my happiness, not something that's fleeting. You are the One that needs to fill this "emptiness" within me. And I'm thankful that I was reminded of that tonight. It's a relief that no matter what You're going to be there. Thanks for this reassurance! -meg